Sometimes I tell other ppl I think I'm retarded... well I have those moments where I think I truely am retarded, but when I think about it properly i know I can't be retarded. It just seems like I am (to myself).
Sometimes when I talk I slur my words together and mess up my pronounciation so that I actually have to stop speaking mid-sentence and think about what I'm trying to say and how to say it right. This happens even when I'm not bliming goddamn drunk. And just to top this off nicely, my lazy eye and goofy-sounding voice add a "nice" effect.
Ok. So there's that. But here's another thing. It can take me longer than everyone else to get a joke sometimes. Like, someone would tell me something totally outrageous and I'd just casually shrug it off like I usually do anyway even without realising it was a joke! Then the other person would say "Sam, it's only a joke." Heh, it makes me wonder if my mum dropped me when I was little:O
When I was little, this little "disability" would help me since I would react in a very good way without knowing that I was giving a good reaction and also without realising it was actually a joke. This made some ppl (i.e. my parents) think I had a good sense of humour and they even told me so. But parents will tell you anything to boost your self-esteem even when it's not true.
This leads me to another thing: giving compliments. I've always been uneasy about receiving them and giving them. When/if I receive one, I'm always unsure about how to acknowledge the complement. Fooor example:
Random person:"You're really good at sport!"
You:"Yea, I know I'm really good at sport!".
The one and only problem with saying this is that IT SOUNDS REALLY COCKY! So therefore I never directly agree with someone when/if they give me a complement. Or another thing you could say when someone gives you a complement is disagree with them about it:
Random person:"You're really good at sport!"
You:"Oh, well not really, I really suck at sport!"
One problem with saying this is that it can come across that you are disrespecting the other person's opinion. So it's almost like a lose/lose situation. So the only solution I have to this when someone gives you a complement is to just simply say "Thanks". And smile.
Nowadays, I never give a complement unless I know that I can be completely sincere about it. And I can't usually be sincere about it, so I hardly ever give complements. Which sucks, cos I know that technically complements are ment to make ppl feel good.
In the past I know I've been guilty of over-analysing many things. And it appears I'm still like that now. I figured it came from having a science-like mind. But hell, one of my uni lecturers, Dr Northcote, (who of course has a pHd) told me I was managing to over-analyse a Proton NMR spectrum. WTF! I didn't know I could actually be THAT over-analytical!!!:O I think it's funny, yet bizarre at the same time.
That reminds me, another classic time where I've been told that I think too much/over-analyse was by an instructor at Hangdog. (Notice the name of my blog title: this is me and what I "think". How fitting) He was trying to explain to me how to use a safety harness and how to stop someone from falling when they climb the wall. It took him 3 goes of explaining it until he just said "look. Stop thinking and just follow what I tell you." So I tried to limit the amount of thoughts I let enter my brain...And then I understood it. That's really odd/funny. Maybe all our problems are just perceptions in our minds.
So i reckon it's good to think but just not too much. Too much thinking is bad. Unless thinking lots is who you are, then shouldn't you just try and be yourself and nothing else even if that means you think too much. There comes the point where you just have to accept character traits that you dislike about yourself and deal with them, rather than resist them and end up looking insincere... right? It makes you think.
Saturday, May 20, 2006
Tuesday, May 02, 2006
Sleep
Hmm, just now I got one of those pop-ups which shows $10,000 flashing in large yellow writing with a red back ground. Only two problems with this pop-up:
1) The rest of the pop-up was written in arabic so I could not understand a single word of what it said!
2) I notice it said $10000 (ten thousand DOLLARS). In general, DOLLARS implies American DOLLARS! And the accepted legal currency in Saudi Arabia is the Saudi Arabian Riyal (SR). So why's a pop-up written in Arabic using dollars?
Anyway, that wasn't what I was meaning this particular "BLOG POST" to be about (lol). Nope, the reason I was writing this post was to complain about what a horrible day I just had:O Nope, JUST KIDDING, I had a pretty good day today;)
Anyway, I'm going off what I was intending to "rant" about again *cough*
Ahem *clears throat*
Right. My day started off with getting up today at 9:40am. It was a Tuesday today and that was good cos Tuesday is the only working day of the week where I don't have to get up at 7am! And I only had to set one alarm clock this morning, cos I have recently been using two alarm clocks to make sure that I don't sleep through their horrible disturbing ringing noises (Alarm clocks are just things you love to hate!!!!!;). However, when I got up today, my lower back arm muscle was all stiff and painful. It hurt as much as getting a dentist filling done without anesthetic:O I don't know why my lower back arm muscle was sore, since it was all fine before I went to sleep. I must have been sleeping in some awkward position. This isn't the first time I've hurt a muscle in my sleep (geez, it's not like I do hard-out fitness routines in my sleep). I've twice had a stiff painful neck from sleeping in some awkward position that I don't know what it was cos I was asleep!
Some people do funny things when they're asleep. I've known myself to sleep while holding one of my arms vertically straight up into the air, where I would suddenly wake up and wonder what I was doing with my arm up in the air like that:O Don't worry, I haven't started sleep walking yet;) But my mum has apparently sleep walked once or twice:S I hope that's not a gene that you can inherit!:O
And when hypnotists hypnotise you, they get you into that very suggestive state which is just before you fall asleep. Maybe it's even a special type of sleep if you will. But I don't know. I'm not a hypnotist... Although I would like to be hehe...
1) The rest of the pop-up was written in arabic so I could not understand a single word of what it said!
2) I notice it said $10000 (ten thousand DOLLARS). In general, DOLLARS implies American DOLLARS! And the accepted legal currency in Saudi Arabia is the Saudi Arabian Riyal (SR). So why's a pop-up written in Arabic using dollars?
Anyway, that wasn't what I was meaning this particular "BLOG POST" to be about (lol). Nope, the reason I was writing this post was to complain about what a horrible day I just had:O Nope, JUST KIDDING, I had a pretty good day today;)
Anyway, I'm going off what I was intending to "rant" about again *cough*
Ahem *clears throat*
Right. My day started off with getting up today at 9:40am. It was a Tuesday today and that was good cos Tuesday is the only working day of the week where I don't have to get up at 7am! And I only had to set one alarm clock this morning, cos I have recently been using two alarm clocks to make sure that I don't sleep through their horrible disturbing ringing noises (Alarm clocks are just things you love to hate!!!!!;). However, when I got up today, my lower back arm muscle was all stiff and painful. It hurt as much as getting a dentist filling done without anesthetic:O I don't know why my lower back arm muscle was sore, since it was all fine before I went to sleep. I must have been sleeping in some awkward position. This isn't the first time I've hurt a muscle in my sleep (geez, it's not like I do hard-out fitness routines in my sleep). I've twice had a stiff painful neck from sleeping in some awkward position that I don't know what it was cos I was asleep!
Some people do funny things when they're asleep. I've known myself to sleep while holding one of my arms vertically straight up into the air, where I would suddenly wake up and wonder what I was doing with my arm up in the air like that:O Don't worry, I haven't started sleep walking yet;) But my mum has apparently sleep walked once or twice:S I hope that's not a gene that you can inherit!:O
And when hypnotists hypnotise you, they get you into that very suggestive state which is just before you fall asleep. Maybe it's even a special type of sleep if you will. But I don't know. I'm not a hypnotist... Although I would like to be hehe...
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